Shut up brain, before I stab you with a Q-tip

I've Moved This Blog!

Sun, 22 Jul 2012 18:09:44 -0500

For those of you that have kept up with my thoughts here, I certainly appreciate it. However, in simplifying my online presence, I’ve chosen to move this tool onto my own site at the link above, rather than maintaining everything on a 3rd party site like Tumblr. I encourage you to bookmark the new site, or point your RSS reader to http://fienen.com/feed. I will no longer be posting content here moving forward.

Only on YouTube can you find identical twin electric harpists...

Thu, 05 Jul 2012 15:04:00 -0500

Only on YouTube can you find identical twin electric harpists covering Aerosmith in a desert.

Dream On - Aerosmith (Electric Harp Duet) Camille and Kennerly, Harp Twins (by CamilleandKennerly)

Back to the Future Lied to Us

Wed, 27 Jun 2012 21:49:36 -0500

So, I was just thinking about something. Remember in Back to the Future III when Marty went back to 1885 and tore his fuel line? He and Dr. Brown then experimented with other fuel options to replace the gasoline. In the process, they tried whiskey and blew up the intake manifold (or something along those lines). Dr. Brown proceeds to explain that it will take him a month to rebuild it, which is an obvious problem, because, you know, pending death and all.

BUT.

Dr. Brown arrived in 1885 via the DeLorean which he then hid in the cave so that Marty could find it in 1955, which he did, and subsequently used to go back to 1885. SO, there was a SECOND DeLorean available in 1885 Hill Valley that they could have scavenged the parts off of (and possibly even fuel, though one could speculate Dr. Brown drained all the fluids and either disposed of them or used them for something else). It’s even reasonable to assume all of that could have been done without destroying the timeline that would allow Marty to travel back in the first place to save Dr. Brown.

Ain’t time travel a bitch?

So, is it just me, or is the NFL.com website slowly backsliding...

Sun, 24 Jun 2012 09:19:00 -0500

So, is it just me, or is the NFL.com website slowly backsliding to something more fitting c.2009? This is an organization that netted something like $9.5B last year. First off, I’m sort of blow away that the homepage isn’t responsive (that’s not to say it’s not mobile friendly - mobile devices get kicked to m.nfl.com). The new, dark background really makes you feel the claustrophobic use of a fixed width layout that uses internal white space barely adequately. There’s virtually no context for elements in the sidebar, with ads visually blurring together with features and headlines of a random sort. The body is just a giant, random assortment of articles from different categories, inexplicably broken up occasionally by a horizontal video block or tweet. In the end, I’m sort of shocked that THIS is the best the NFL can do with their home page, because in my humble opinion, this is pretty much just awful. It’s not even helpful as a news site, because the information is so random.

It probably says a lot about me that the first thing I did with...

Fri, 15 Jun 2012 12:05:47 -0500

It probably says a lot about me that the first thing I did with the Clean Dictionary is this…

Sorry, I just couldn’t help myself.

Tue, 05 Jun 2012 08:45:58 -0500

Sorry, I just couldn’t help myself.

How many times do I have to say it? DON’T PASTE FROM WORD....

Tue, 05 Jun 2012 08:19:06 -0500

How many times do I have to say it? DON’T PASTE FROM WORD. Caught this on the local news scroller on the Today Show this morning.

This is EXACTLY why retail loses to online

Mon, 21 May 2012 18:22:27 -0500

JCP, this one is for you, because it illustrates the exact problem with why online marketplaces have the power to not only disrupt, but crush you. I needed shoes. It happens. Specifically, I wanted the all black Chuck Taylor Converse All Stars to wear with my suit this weekend.

Yes, I wear Chucks with a suit. I’m one of Those Guys. That’s beside the point. Now, I didn’t need them tonight, or tomorrow, but in time for the weekend. So it wasn’t last minute, but there was a schedule to respect in the matter.

Problem #1

I absolutely hate retailers that have both brick and mortar stores, and online stores, and their online stores don’t tell me a:) if my local store carries the item, and b:) if my local store currently has it in stock. I’m sorry, there’s no excuse, especially for you Big Department Stores with your Fancy Inventory Management. You should know this, and as an extension, I should know this. It’s getting more common, but there are still some out there (JCPenny’s, I’m looking right at you) that don’t.

But I needed the shoes, and it wasn’t a long drive, so I went down to the local mall and went in to JCP and found, to my delight, that they HAD the shoes in question. Good deal. “Hey Mr. Shoe Guy that’s ignoring me, do you have these in a 9?” He goes in back and returns with two boxes. The black ones I wanted in an 8, and the black on white style in a 9. I didn’t ask for 8s. I could at least attempt to get into bigger shoes, but smaller? Physics, good sir, physics.

Problem #2

You didn’t have my size. Ultimately forgivable (though only barely, assuming your business is to sell me crap and your chance to do it is when I’m in front of you). If you sell out, you sell out. But in this case, and 8 is FAR too small for me. And what did I discover? You were happy to offer me the chance to order them, but it would take 5-7 days.

Conclusion

So what happens? I tried on your black-on-white 9s. They fit perfectly. I left. I didn’t buy them. Instead, I’m going to go on to Amazon Prime, order them cheaper than you had them, and get them in two days (with free return option if they don’t fit, but thanks to you, I know they will).

First, it blows my mind that I can order something online and have it UPS’d to me faster than their internal supply chain can get it to them. That’s insane and ultimately unhelpful. Second, there’s a store 30 minutes from here the next town over. I don’t need shoes right this instant, and the gas I’ll burn will pretty much take away any chance at savings. THEY should have a truck running nightly to shuttle inventory back and forth. If they could have said “Hey, we don’t have it, but Joplin does and we can have it here in the morning,” I would have bought it. But no. Lost sale.

If you are a B&M retailer, your chance to make a sale is when I’m right in front of you. Once I walk out that door, you are screwed. And if you can’t give me a better alternative, you will lose that sale every single time. Even in the case of knowing one’s size, folks like Amazon offer free return shipping to get you the right size. So the only mitigating factor becomes one of time vs. necessity.

B&M retail store, take this as a lesson. Thanks to JCP for helping me find exactly what I want and take my sale elsewhere, that was very kind of you. You HAVE to do better than this.

This is a really cool look at multi-axis time lapse video....

Mon, 21 May 2012 12:14:05 -0500

This is a really cool look at multi-axis time lapse video. I’d love to be this smart and creative.

El Cielo de Canarias 2012 / The Light of Stars (by Daniel López)

This is one of the more strangely creepy splash images on a...

Mon, 21 May 2012 08:22:24 -0500

This is one of the more strangely creepy splash images on a website I’ve seen.

Touché: Enhancing Touch Interaction on Humans, Screens, Liquids,...

Thu, 10 May 2012 14:17:26 -0500

Touché: Enhancing Touch Interaction on Humans, Screens, Liquids, and Everyday Objects (by DisneyResearchHub)

I would watch this. All 70mm of it.

Tue, 24 Apr 2012 15:33:19 -0500

I would watch this. All 70mm of it.

Video

Sat, 21 Apr 2012 23:25:17 -0500

The Tintype Studio @ Dutch Design Week Eindhoven 2011 on Photography Served

Fri, 30 Mar 2012 08:08:12 -0500

The Tintype Studio @ Dutch Design Week Eindhoven 2011 on Photography Served:

These are awesome. That is all.

This gets to be some of the hell I’m gonna have to work...

Thu, 29 Mar 2012 16:06:35 -0500

This gets to be some of the hell I’m gonna have to work with in the coming weeks. Yay EU.

The stupid EU cookie law in 2½ minutes (by silktide)

Quinta Da Romaneira Vintage Port

Sun, 25 Mar 2012 11:28:34 -0500

Quinta Da Romaneira Vintage Port:

Excited to try out this port I just ordered.

“Christian Seely’s own property. Even more opaque than the Silval, this has a very expressive nose with blackberry, liquorices, a touch of fruitcake and freshly tilled soil. Good definition. The palate has wonderful concentration, with an almost viscous texture, good acidity cutting through those layers of rich black, saturated fruit, leading to a honeyed, svelte finish that caresses the mouth like Fonseca. Superb. Tasted May 2009.” - 95Points Neal Martin - Wine Journal

Anyone want to be the new graphic designer for NFL.com? I can...

Wed, 21 Mar 2012 23:43:43 -0500

Anyone want to be the new graphic designer for NFL.com? I can only imagine they’re hiring, since they’ve apparently got their secretary doing their homepage images right now.

But seriously? What kind of imagery is this? They realize it’s 2012, yeah?

Yes please. Is it bad that I’m pretty sure I own over half...

Mon, 19 Mar 2012 17:01:31 -0500

Yes please. Is it bad that I’m pretty sure I own over half the games that they show in the trailer (and the rest are on my to-get list).

Tabletop: Trailer (by geekandsundry)

This is all that’s on the BuffaloBills.com homepage. So I...

Sun, 18 Mar 2012 20:54:48 -0500

Traditional Home Page

Mobile Site Home Page

This is all that’s on the BuffaloBills.com homepage. So I guess if you don’t want a jersey, or season/club tickets, you’re just screwed. Unless you just click randomly and discover their little logo at the bottom is the key.

The mobile site is just as bad. Basically just a news feed - no schedule or stats or anything else, and no way to go to the desktop homepage if you’re on something like a tablet. If the site thinks you’re “mobile,” it utterly traps you.

Thoughts on PPC Advertising Policies

Thu, 08 Mar 2012 15:33:08 -0600

So, I’ve recently gotten a couple bulk emails from HostGator regarding affiliate use of PPC ads. Here’s the latest one:

Hello Affiliates,

This is a reminder about our Pay Per Click Policy as unfortunately there are many affiliates that are still not abiding by the Terms of Service.

Please remember that it is against the affiliate TOS (Here: http://www.hostgator.com/tos/affiliate-tos.php ) to bid on trademark + keywords. Please remember to look at your keywords and match types to make sure that you don’t have the word HostGator in any of your search terms.

This includes:

HostGator
HostGator.com
Host Gator
www.hostgator.com
http://www.hostgator.com
hostgator review
hostgator reviews
hostgator coupon
hostgator coupons
hostgator discount
hostgator promo
hostgator promo code
Host Gator Review
Host Gator Coupon
Anything else with the word HostGator in it

Please discontinue bidding on these search phrases immediately. Those affiliates who continue to do so will be at risk of having their affiliate account terminated and their sales voided.

Please let us know if you have any questions.

Thank you,
HostGator.com Affiliate Team

Now, this raises two main issues for me.

1: When you see PPC ads on sites, and they mention a brand, do you just assume that ad was placed by that brand? I’m guessing you do, or at least, you don’t worry about if it’s not. But it does raise a pretty obvious question of what role the ad provider has in protecting a brand in ads placed on its service. Not that Pepsi would ever run an ad for Coke, mind you - but situations like this where an affiliate has a definite interest in getting clicks for the brand, but might be doing so in a way that the brand manager for the company doesn’t approve of. Worse yet, maybe they make false claims or such about the service to mislead people into signing up. I need to look more into the trademark issues involved on that.

2: The flipside of the coin. If I’m willing to bid more for a brand’s keyword than the brand, should I have that ability? Of course the brand can build it into their TOS like HostGator has, and stand by the “if you want to be an affiliate, you have to follow these rules” line. But is that really the right thing to do? Is it ultimately in the brand’s interests? Strictly speaking, if I’m bidding on someone else’s use of their name in a search, and maybe I don’t even use their name in the ad (for instance, Pepsi bidding on Coke keywords, but using the opportunity to show off their new drink), does the targeted brand have any recourse?

It’s an interesting marketing world we live in right now.